Posts Tagged ‘Soccer’

Chad Ochocinco and the NFLPA’s influence on the MLS


2011
03.23

I wrote to a friend my thoughts on Chad Ochocinco’s tryout with Sporting KC.  Read the article I link to in the previous sentence first, or you won’t know what I’m talking about.

Here’s what I wrote back to my friend, unedited:

“soccer shape” I assume means cutting a few pounds.  It’s interesting.  I don’t think it’s that funny, but I think it’s serious…I mean, as serious as sports go, you know.  It could be a big interest boost for the MLS if he makes it, but at the same time, it could be a big legitimacy loss.  I think since I’m torn between the two I can’t find it funny.
Just sorta thinking “out loud” for the rest of this…

The other thing about it is just that the lockout in general could be huge for the MLS.  Even if a an eighth of NFL fans decide to tune into the MLS (and not just 85) it’ll be fantastic for the MLS.  One of the problems MLS has is name recognition.  Messi vs. Jeff Cunningham.  Ronaldo vs. Josh Saunders.  If some of the guys that like soccer but don’t watch MLS give it the time to learn some names and become fans we’re talking about years of good the lockout could do for the MLS.  Once those eighth watch, ESPN gives it more coverage and thus more fans.I think the NFL is probably going to work it out though.  There’s too much money to be lost.  Maybe the thought of it will get people to start the MLS season so they know what’s going on in the fall.  I think that number is going to be very small, but with the MLS’ TV numbers right now even ~40,000 would be significant.

Yet another thing could be that Ochocinco discoveries how little the MLS players make.  He’s not one not to make a fuss.  Particularly with the eye on the NFLPA, the MLSPA could gain a lot by 85 being around.
I doubt he’ll be on the team Saturday when they play Chicago.  Maybe though.  Game time is 15:00 Central.  Whether he’ll make the team eventually I’m not sure.  His touch can’t be that great, but if he can head a ball he’s got some ups.  If he can get some good through balls there’s only so many times you can goof up a 1v1.  It all just remains to be seen.

I hope he makes it.  But I hope he’s legit.  I don’t want him to make it and it be a joke.

MLS Single Table and Relegation


2010
11.03

I was just listening to today’s MLS Talk podcast and I had to say something about the relegation topic. This is going to be brief because I don’t have much time at the moment.

If the MLS is going to expand beyond relegation/promotion solves a lot of problems.

1) It gives teams at the bottom (and the top of the “2nd division”) something to play for at the end of the season.  Now, I think these should both be “top divisions”.  The NCAA has Division I for all sports except American football.  the MLS could do something similar. MLS Premier could be the top or MLS Championship could be the 2nd or something.  As far as TV rights go, MLS Championship would be under the same Fox Soccer/ESPN/Versus(!??!) contracts.  Did Newcastle lose it’s history when they went to the English Championship last year?  Is Leeds United still a name that carries a lot of weight in English football? YES! If the LA Galaxy gets relegated, they will still be the team of Beckham and Donovan.

2) True cup competition.  The MLS Cup as it stands can go away.  Allow the “minnows” play the big boys every year in a (Carling) League Cup each year.

3) This isn’t such a problem, as a bonus, but it allows the MLS to bump all the way up to 40 teams if they like.  Let Cincinnati and Charlotte both have teams…or Charlotte and Raleigh if it makes more sense.  There are plenty of markets out there that have a major sport (NHL in Raleigh) and then nothing else (NBA in San Antonio).  ”Everyone” can get in on this.  MLS’ market is local at the moment.  Build the league around that.  The national draw teams are going to rise out of that.  Does the local nature of English football keep Chelsea and Manchester United from being hugely interesting teams on a national basis?  No.  Not at all.

4) This solves the scheduling issue.  Everyone gets 38 regular season games.  If there aren’t that many teams, you could go the German route with 18 teams.  16 teams is how the Allsvenskan does it and I quite liked the 30-game MLS season this year.  Now, it’s a World Cup year, so that filled in the schedule a bit more, but keeping the schedule with fewer games would allow the US Open Cup and CONCACAF Champions League to at least maintain the minimal coverage they have now.  I suspect those competitions would become even more irrelevant if the MLS had 8 more games in the season.

The problems and how to resolve them.

1) The main problem with relegation is that “owners will not stand for it.”  First off, make the “minnows” pay the same entrance fee.  Also, allow expansion teams in the top division and relegate 4 instead of 3 (if there is the standard relegation #) and if there is more than one expansion team, up the number of relegated teams.  Perhaps expansion teams get a 3-year grace period of relegation or something.  The MLS CBA would apply to this “2nd division” as would any other MLS rules.  The MLS “2nd division” owners would have the same votes as the MLS Premier division.

2) Americans won’t understand.  Who cares? “Americans” don’t like soccer.  Stop trying to cater to a non-existent market. Maybe people like me would care a little more if I didn’t have to drive 3 hours to a game.  Maybe I’d go to local Madison matches if one day Madison United could get promoted to the USL or to the MLS or something. I am *not* proposing the USL get involved in this, I’d just making a point about local football.

What this doesn’t address is the scheduling.  Personally, I’m fine with the summer games.  The World Cup* is difficult, but until the US consistently gets past the round of 16, playing through the latter changes isn’t that big of a deal.  If it is a bigger deal, start the season earlier every 4 years. It’s not that big of a deal.  I know personally I’d probably end up watching less MLS if it was always competing with Bundesliga, UCL, La Liga, EPL, SPL, NHL, NBA and NCAA hockey/basketball.  Right now it fights those to a certain extent but during the summer it’s main competition for me is the Allsvenskan and for most Americans, it would be MLB (I’d watch more MLB – and MLS for that matter – if there weren’t so many blackouts on DirecTV).

*There’s also the Gold Cup, but my feeling is it could be played every four years the year before the Confederations Cup so that it “means something”.

NFL Pre-Season and “Winter Break”


2010
08.24

I’m still officially on hiatus, but I couldn’t help but comment on this NY Times article about the NFL. As you know, I’m not an NFL guy, but I’ve been interested in this move to the 18-game season.

Let me talk about something first to set the stage for my discussion on the NFL. Skip to the end if you don’t want to read my soccer mumbo-jumbo. :)

The EPL (English Premier League), or BPL (Barclay’s Premier League) as I’ve been hearing it called for the first times recently, has this type of discussion all the time. The next few sentences here are simply back-story, but stick with me. The German League has 18 teams in it, which cuts out 4 games. The Spanish League has 20 teams, but has only one domestic cup. The Italian League has two domestic cups and 20 teams in the league. The French League also is a 20 and 2. I’m not going to pretend to know if there is talk of shortening the season in France or Italy, but the argument against Italy could certainly be that the weather is better there than in the English (and Wales*…which is probably why BPL is catching on). The same could be said for France, though not to the degree of Italy.

The Germans have a winter break with their four games and one cup removed from the schedule. Many want a winter break in England (and Wales, let’s not forget them). I’m not sure about other leagues with winter breaks. Some leagues, such as my beloved Fotbollsallsvenskan take off the entire winter, but that’s not what we are talking about here. We’re talking about taking December off, or something like that.

Here’s where we bring it all back to the NFL…the EPL/BPL has the same problem the NFL does. Christmas games are a big deal in England, and doing away with that would destroy traditions.

I realize people are resistant to change, but there’s no reason change has to destroy *important* traditions. I’d claim there’s a difference in “the way things have always been done” and a true tradition. True tradition has emotional value and not just stick-in-the-mud resistance to change.

Let’s assume we stick with 16 games in the NFL. If you don’t see where I’m going yet – the NFL could have some sort of winter break. I’d suggest in between Thanksgiving and Christmas for both the EPL and NFL. That way Christmas and Thanksgiving games could be held. Maybe between Black Friday and Christmas Eve. Let everyone do their shopping, watch basketball and hockey, spend time with their family, study for exams and anything else that a human might do when it’s not NFL season. Give the players some time to rest and come back refreshed so we can watch the best of the best battle it out for the playoff spots. No one likes it when their team is put out because of an injury…except the team that takes their place and even then there’s always that nagging “well if Joe Montana [or whoever] hadn’t gotten hurt…” The same, of course, is true of the EPL, though their season extends to May and not the first weekend in February. The EPL has the additional problem of having to deal with the World Cup every four years (and continental competitions every 2), but that’s neither here nor there. What the EPL does only moderately affects us in the US as there are only a handful of US internationals playing in the league and game times are early enough on Saturdays as to be a royal pain and the others are during the work day.

The NFL would have to work out at what week to start the break. This year Thanksgiving is week 12. That seems a little late. I’m not going to go into the options in detail, but the season could be moved into August to give the southern teams the advantage the northern teams have in the winter. Then the break could be between the playoffs and the season. This is essentially what happens in college football (well, division I-AA conferences without a conference championship, anyway). The other option is to move it to week 10. Both of those have advantages and disadvantages. If there’s a lot of feedback, maybe I’ll spend some time going through those, but for now, it’s just something to ponder.

When it’s all said and done, what could be better than a Super Bowl in late February, followed by March Madness, followed by NBA and NHL playoff pushes and then playoffs? All this and you still get to see Thanksgiving and Christmas games and spend some time with your family.

*Scotland has it’s own, well-respected league. Northern Ireland has a less-respected league (to be honest, I wasn’t even sure they had a league until doing a little research!).

Coaches: Feed Your Star, Players: Keep Your Head In It


2010
07.03

Cristiano Ronaldo and Wayne Rooney were both clearly frustrated in their World Cup exits.  Tactics could have been the cause for both.

Should Rooney have been played alone up top?  Should Crouch have played more?  Considering the goal, should Defoe have played more?

With Portugal…well, if you saw their matches, you know their tactics.  I’m not sure there’s a word for offense in Portuguese.

What brings me to write this though is I had a similar experience during my Wednesday game and I have a tip for both players and coaches.  Before I get into that, I just want to mention that I try to use my own experiences as well as those people see on TV because I want us to have a level playing field for knowledge (TV) and I assume most people reading this blog aren’t professional athletes or coaches and I want to make sure you know analysis of the big boys applies at all levels (to varying degrees, of course).

Last week I wrote that I had 4 goals.  They weren’t amazing, but they went in.  This Wednesday, no goals, no assists.

The game started off poorly for me…well, sorta. I stole the first or second pass of the opposing team (that’s fantastic, no?) and immediately fired a shot to try to catch the keeper off guard.  Problem was, I was still in the midfield circle.  Brilliant if it works, minor if it doesn’t, except in this case I wasn’t set at all and it had me second-guessing myself early.  I pride myself on not putting the ball over the bar.  As a natural keeper, sending it over the bar is my best friend.  It wasn’t pretty.  It got to me a bit, but no biggie.  Later, I sliced the defense and put one off the far post on what shouldn’t have been that difficult of a strike.  I was glad I made the chance though.  I then had a corner where I probably should have biked the ball.  Instead, I didn’t even get a shot off.  At this point I was still in it mentally and thought my chance would come.  I mean, I was making chances, after all.

I suppose it was just the straw that broke the camels back, but I later beat a defender with some solid ball work and pace, then sent in a good cross only to have the keeper make a nice save.

In hindsight, it *wasn’t* *all* my fault.  Last week the defense played a high back line and I was able to get in behind them.  That’s what I do best.  Not only was I able to get back there, but I was able to play the ball through to people that would eventually give me the ball back on a cross.  This week the back line was deep and we were crowded up front.  Now, the midfield probably could have done a better job staying out of my way, but at the end of the day, the through balls were leaving me with very little room to operate.  I did end up dropping back, which is probably what I should have done with the midfielders crowding things, but that took me out of my game and in the end I decided to go play in my natural position, the goal.  Whether me playing in the goal or not helped the team I’m not sure, but my confidence was shot up front.  In most case players don’t have the luxury of deciding when they play a certain position, so make sure you stick it out.  Losing mental focus can lead to missing chances when they come and also nasty challenges that not only could get you sent off or booked, but also could hurt someone.  Last week I probably would have stayed up because I wasn’t that worried about my performance and maybe had I done that this week the goals would have come.  Impossible to tell, but knowing I’m the best keeper on the team, I can’t just feel I’m being a waste out in the field.  One of these days I’ll set up a camera to see how my attitude reflects reality, but that’s not happening for a bit.

Often commentators talk about building a team around a player and that’s the type of player I’m talking about here.  Often high schools and even club teams are at the mercy of their local talent and a coach can’t build a squad out of what s/he wants.  As a coach, you have to play the draft tactic of “pick the best player available.”  National teams have this problem to an extent, but the footballing powers usually have the luxury of doing what they want.  Dunga wanted to play defensive and despite their quarterfinal exit, Brazil did that.  Let’s not kid ourselves.  No own goal and no red card and Brazil wins that game.

The dynamics of each game are different and thus “building a team around a player” can be different each game.  If you have a player that can play on both sides of the pitch, pair him/her against the weaker back.  If a team is crowding the back, you might shift your players more to one side to give more room to your star.

While pairing someone on a weaker side might not work as well in any other sport as the sides are more fluid in American football, hockey and basketball, finding ways to get your star in the game early is still important.  What separates a Jordan or Kobe from a Rooney or a Ronaldo is their ability to stay in the game and not get frustrated when the going gets tough.  We’ve all seen Kobe frustrated but when it came to game 7, he focused and found a way.  Not everyone can do that and if your top receiver or your star center (basketball or hockey) isn’t getting the ball, talk to the offense on the sidelines, call a timeout or talk to the line on the bench to make sure they know what needs to happen.  Making sure a team knows the star without hurting the confidence of the others can be tricky, but if you can convey that it’s a team effort even if you do have a big play guy, then you should be fine.  Let your players know that Jordan needed Pippen and Kobe needed Gasol (and Shaq before him, of course).  There are examples of this in every sport, so there’s no need to belabor it.

Even if right and left do not mean as much, giving your star space to operate is still important.  The clear out in basketball and having a receiver split to one side with others opposite are both example of giving a star space.  One might think of getting runners on base for your big hitters as a similar baseball strategy.  Put your star in a position to make big plays.

One last note: don’t make a star out of someone who isn’t.  If your team doesn’t have a big hitter, manufacture runs with base running.  If you don’t have a play-maker, wear teams out with solid defensive play.  Coaching a team without offensive weapons is a topic for another article, but I didn’t want to leave people thinking the clear out was the only strategy I am promoting.  Doing different things and keeping teams off-balance is key…unless you are Spain and are just so good you can keep doing the same thing until the other team cracks, but that’s yet another article. :)

Still need to get some South Africa pics up on flickr, but a lot of them are up now.  Once I get them up, I’ll get that article posted.  World Cup isn’t over yet, so a World Cup article is still pertinent, no? :)

America’s reaction to Donovan’s goal


2010
06.26

I have to say, the reaction to this team and to the goal has meant more to me as a football fan than the goal itself has. Even before the game, ESPN has been giving it equal coverage to Wimbledon and the NBA Finals. I’ve thought for some time we were just on the cusp of becoming a major sport, potentially as big as hockey, but not as big as the other three. I thought we were held back by European game times, and we certainly still are. But if Americans are good at one thing, it’s patriotism. Even the Marxists I know (who, you know, aren’t the biggest fans of our government) are some of the biggest fans when the US played Canada in the Gold Medal Game in ice hockey and also when it comes to US Soccer.

I’m going to look back at my previous posts and see what I’ve said about needed improvements to the MLS, and if I haven’t said enough, I’ll do an article.

For now though, I really wanted to just throw up the following link. I don’t know if anyone at MLS Talk made this video, so I’m not going to just embedded the video, but it’s well worth the click. The reaction in the *streets* of NYC and the reaction of grandmas is just so priceless.

http://www.majorleaguesoccertalk.com/the-worlds-reaction-to-landon-donovans-game-winning-goal-video/9647

Also, MLS Talk is doing a World Cup Buzz podcast during the World Cup. I’ve never listened to it as MLS Talk, but I have listened to EPL Talk, which is the same group and EPL Talk is great. It’s more frequent than ESPN SoccerNet’s Podcast. I also enjoy the SoccerLens podcast, for those of you looking for some podcasts. I listen to some others, so if you want more, let me know.

While talking about podcasts, I’m going to use this opportunity for some shameless self-promotion. I do a music podcast called ‘Music Manumit.’ You can find it at http://musicmanumit.blogspot.com. We’ve discussed the World Cup in passing a bit and briefly discussed the opening ceremonies, but really, it’s about music. So, if you’re a music fan, check it out. Also, if you’re an artist that releases under Creative Commons (or have any tracks under Creative Commons), feel free to send them our way.

Not the South Africa review


2010
06.24

As many of you know, I was in South Africa last week for the US-England and US-Slovenia matches.  What many of you don’t know is that I caught Ebola while I was there. …ok, so not Ebola, but I was pretty sick.  I was literally sick the entire time.  The day after I got back to the states I got anti-biotics.  Didn’t want to deal with the doctor in ZA.

Anyway, this means there is going to be a delay in getting my pictures up (some are already up) and also in writing my article (there’s already a draft…though after writing this post I potentially need a new title).  I apologize for the delay.  Believe me, I’d have preferred to be writing daily articles.

One brainless notes:

Chicago Fire pics also up.

A Little Sports Psychology and Some Tactics

Being sick (like drugs) does amazing things to the body and mind.  I played yesterday despite not being 100% even today from my respiratory Ebola (though I’m getting pretty close).  I’m probably going to sound like I’m gloating here, but I have a couple points to make, so stay with me.

I scored four goals, all left footed (I’m right-footed) and absolutely should have had at least a fifth.  A potential 6th would have been the only one to make a highlight reel, but I sent it just barely over the bar (not a field goal).  I think people were mostly impressed by the fact that I even struck the ball cleanly on a volley as I was being taken to the ground.  No foul, I was mostly try to jump over the defender for the volley and it didn’t quite work as I’d have liked. My goals were all ones you’d be expected to put away (and one I stole from what was going to be an own goal, to be honest).  Just for the full story (ok, now I’m gloating…) I also should have had at least one assist.  To put this in perspective, I’ve scored two goals in the season up until now.  Granted, I’ve played left back in a couple of the games and in the goal a couple games, but I played up top this game as I have a couple times before.

Ok, this is where I start making my point…

I’m reasonably fast and reasonably strong.  I can beat players for pace and I can muscle people off the ball – not everyone, but enough for those to be effective strategies for me.  Often when one is sick the game slows down. Not only are you more likely to take care of the fundamentals, but you’re also more likely to work on instinct – that’s kinda what our minds and bodies does when incredibly taxed.  Because of not having the energy to do otherwise, I minimized my runs, stayed higher up the pitch and let the game come to me.  Normally, as one of the better players on my team, I track back to receive the ball and help defensively (as a life-long keeper, defense is important to me).  For the rest of the season, I now realize that if I can score two goals, it’s ok if our defense gives up a goal while I’m at midfield watching the last defender.  This is not to say you should not put in the extra effort the team needs.  I got back on corners to cover a post, for example and sometimes circumstances dictate that scoring isn’t the most important thing.  Our game was very open and we’re not playing for very much.  However, if all you need is a point for a championship maybe you should do the football/hockey version of working the shot-clock.  Clock management is important in all major sports except baseball where I think the closest equivalent is pitcher selection based on inning and pitch count. Like much of life, it’s situational.

All of this is emphatically not to say being sick is the best way to play.  I was barely getting up and down the pitch an hour in and really should have come out.  You can set back your recovery (I don’t seem to have), get injured or simply not be capable of producing a result.  For example, there was what was nearly a glorious through ball that I just couldn’t get to.  I’m not entirely sure I’d have gotten to it on a good day but the defense was beat (keeper came out a step before I got there) and I’d like to think I’d gotten it.

I feel as though I had another point to make, but staying true to my free software roots, I’m going to release early and release often.  If I remember the point, I’ll post it in the comments.

These points, broadly, apply to any sport.  Just think of Jordan against the Jazz.  My career-high in basketball (25*) came when I had the flu (though I faded through the game and we ended up losing)

  • Take one thing at a time (a good life lesson in general). Being one play ahead strategically is great, but there’s a difference in knowing you’re going to 2nd rather than 1st and having your head turned to 2nd before the ball is in the glove.
  • When in doubt, go to goal.  If all you ever do is pass, the shot clock is going to run out, your power play is going to be over, etc
  • Relax.  Part of the reason being sick can help you out on the field is that there’s no pressure.  I, at least, always feel that if I’m able to contribute at all when sick then that’s better than not being on the field.  I have a “I’ll take what I can get attitude” and just play.  This isn’t to suggest that there isn’t “Kobe time,” but part of Kobe-time is blocking out thoughts about the girlfriend in the stands, the media tearing you a new one or simply what your coach and teammates are going to say, and simply getting the job done.
  • Trust your instincts. Doing this will help you relax.  If you’re instinct is to do the same cross-over every time or to try to rainbow the keeper every time, maybe you should disregard this suggestion and spend a little more time on the practice field, but for anyone that knows the game, you’re going to instinctively pick up one when the defense has picked up your best move (or simply that you’re left footed) or when the opposing player is starting to try a new strategy against your stonewall defense.
  • Trust your teammates.  Kobe-time didn’t work in game 7 of the NBA finals, so what did Kobe do?  He trusted his teammates.  You can’t pitch and cover center-field at the same time unless you’re playing against 5’10” 400-pounders, so let your teammates do their job.  If the center-fielder bobbles the ball, at least you’re there to back up the catcher when the throw to the plate is off.
  • Play your position.  Again, I hesitate to put this in, since I stressed this in trusting your teammates, but I want to mention it again because you need to know what your position is.  You need to know this sick or not, but if you aren’t sure of your responsibilities, ask your coach.  If you’re embarrassed to ask just imagine how much more you’ll be embarrassed when you screw it all up during the big game while the cute girls (or guys) are watching in the stands.

Who knows, maybe I learned nothing yesterday to help me going forward and the gods of football were just on my side after trekking 24-hours worth of flight time (one-way) to South Africa.  More on that next time!

*while that’s not a particularly impressive career high, you have to understand that I got best-defense senior year of high school.  Imagine Artest or more appropriately, Rodman, dropping 25 in a 40-minute game (NBA is 48 of course)

Thoughts on US Chances with ~3 days to go


2010
06.08

First off, join my World Cup bracket group.

I got the following excerpt from someone that will remain unnamed:

Oh now I understand why you are heading there for the early rounds and not the finals. Sorry to hurt your feelings, but the teams you are supporting aren’t going to get past the first rounds. Except maybe for England – but I don’t expect them to get near the semis.

I second you on the French though. Hate em and want to see them head back asap. Same goes with Brazil – except that I’ll miss their samba chicks on TV.

I’ve been supporting Argentina and Italy since 98. Hoping that Messi will do great this year and I’m also looking forward to seeing Milito repeat his champions league performance (if they let him play). At least he seems to be in the squad.

The following was my response:

Really, you don’t have the US getting out of the group stage?  Who do you think is going to go ahead?  I could see Algeria winning the group or not getting a point.  They are the most inconsistent side I’ve ever seen.

To be clear, I think the US will go out against Germany in the 2nd round, but it’s really a tough call…

The US’ road could be pretty easy *should they win the group*.  They could see a weakened Ghana side in the 2nd round and then potentially Uruguay in the Quarters.  In the semis they’d play Brazil, which they proved last summer they can play with, but ultimately they’ll lose that match I think.  The US proved last summer they can play in the altitude and the cold of South Africa.  Now, I’m not predicting that will happen, but whoever wins Group C might have an easy road to the semis.  Even if the US finishes 2nd in the group, Germany has tons of injury problems and Maradona hasn’t proven himself to be a great manager, so even if the US comes 2nd in the group, they could be looking at semi –finals.

There are three x-factors: 1) how do teams play in the cold (the old MLS players have done that in Chicago, New York and New England in the past) and 2) how do they play at altitude (Salt Lake City and Denver for the former MLS players…which is basically everyone on the US squad). 3) How will being in Africa work for the African nations.  With injuries, the African nations are looking pretty weak at the moment.

England has looked pretty bad in the warmups and the US has looked pretty good.  Now, what to take from friendlies is hard to say but with Buddle and Findley added to the team the US may have found a strike partnership like they’ve never had before.  Gomez has been on fine form as well.  The defense has been shaky, but hopefully they learned some lessons against Turkey.

It’s pretty exciting that there are no teams without questions.  Brazil has no plan B and Spain has injury concerns, despite being the clear favorites.

Please let me know how you feel about this assessment.  I’d love to get some good conversation going in the comments!

The “Unprofessional Foul”


2010
05.19

I was wholeheartedly going to do an article on travel problems in South Africa…I know, I’ve been trying to plan them.  However, a situation came up today that warrants addressing.  Before I say anything else, I’d like to say this is water under the bridge.  I am just posting this as a cautionary tale to recreational sports enthusiasts out there.

If you want to skip the stories, scroll to the end for the take-home points.  There are some tips for coaches, players and just some general life tips at the bottom that hopefully will avoid the story I am about to recount.

People play pick-up sports for fun.  No one wins trophies, makes millions of dollars or gets laid by hot Swedish women when they play a good game.  I play harder than most people.  I think any of my friends would back that up.  They’d also probably say I might be a little bit of a loose cannon. Guys like Dennis Rodman and Wayne Rooney are my heroes (although, the whole wearing a dress thing…not into that.).  That said, I’ve *never* been ejected from a game in which I played.

Let me digress a second to tell a story… I was ejected from a game *as a fan* where the officiating was horrible.  This is how bad officiating was that game…I was wearing a bright green shirt (imagine the brightest green shirt possible or take a look at the Software Freedom Day 2007 shirt – the jpg doesn’t do it justice).  The ref tells my brother’s team’s coach (who was actually my coach 8 years earlier) that the guy in the *maroon* shirt was mouthing off.  I was honestly scared someone’s legs were going to be broken.  Slide-tackles from behind where not only were no cards shown, but no fouls called.  As it turned out, the coach thanked me after the game because he said “rather you than me” and a parent FROM THE OTHER TEAM also got ejected.  This was not a case of getting beat and wanting calls.  In fact, NCSSM won the state championship that year, so they didn’t get beat often. It was really the most unbelievable piece of garbage officiating I’ve ever seen at any level in any sport and thankfully there was someone there who knew enough about the sport to not put up with it.  Everyone else there was either a coward or didn’t realize what was going on.  If they didn’t know what was going on, that’s fine, they are supporting their school and their friends…that’s what they should be doing.  Anyway, I suppose being color-blind does make it hard to tell which team is which…

But, like I said, I’ve never been ejected from a game in which I’ve played.  I’ve been “disqualified” by using up my fouls in basketball, but even when I’m playing in competitive leagues I keep my fouls hard but not stupid.  I won “Best Defense” my senior year in high school, so I must have been doing something right (admittedly, we weren’t very good, but it’s not like we lost every game either).

All of this is to say, when someone is playing so aggressively I can’t respect it, you’re doing something wrong.  Which brings us to the story.  It’s a pretty simple story really.  For the past few weeks I’ve been sending emails to our pickup group hinting to stop the slide-tackling.  I haven’t wanted to ban it completely, but I may need to now.  First off, my former roommate about does a back flip when this guy goes straight at his feet.  Note that my former roommate was not wearing shin guards…most people don’t.  I’m sure most everyone on the field winces at that, but nothing much happens.

I’m playing in the goal, as I’m often conned* into doing.  The ball is way out in front of this guy and as I go out to grab it off the ground he slides and his cleats came about three inches from my face.  I’m not entirely sure I’ve *ever* had someone come that close to my face and I’ve played in the goal for years.  I don’t know what the official call on that is.  I assume that’s a yellow and probably a red if he connects, but I don’t know.  I mean, it’s not exactly like my face is exactly where the ball was.  He didn’t go through the ball to get to my face.  So, I told him how I felt about it.  I don’t exactly remember what I said, but I know it wasn’t family friendly, so I won’t repeat it.  I was probably thinking about my former roommate getting upended, but clearly I wasn’t pleased.  He says, “I didn’t mean to slide,” which is utter crap.  I mean, I don’t know exactly what he meant.  ”I didn’t mean to come so close to your face”, perhaps.  At that point, I wasn’t willing to give him the benefit of the doubt (or able considering the speed with which I reacted).  It seemed like an utter, bold-faced lie.  You don’t not mean to slide.  If you fall, you fall in a more clumsy manner or if you accidentally slide into someone, you don’t wait for the person to get pissed to apologize.  Perhaps had he said “I didn’t mean to slide” before I let him know how I thought about, I’d have kept my calm thinking it was just a slip up of words.  But, he waited.  Presumably, he wasn’t going to apologize, not thinking he had done anything wrong.  While I clearly am *not* apologizing for how I reacted, there’s no beef.  After the game he apologized when I had a cool enough head to give him the benefit of the doubt.  I just want to keep that clear as I recount the heated exchange.  Also, I want to make it clear that I reacted inappropriately.

I’m going to digress a bit and while I digress it will probably become clear what happened next.  I’m not sure who started this, or if it’s a European thing, but if, as a player, you just did something stupid or fouled someone hard (accidentally or on purpose), don’t go get in their face.  We have this thing in America called “personal space” and if someone is yelling obscenities at you and you’d like not to get punched in the face, it’s probably not a good idea to break into that space.  After a *lot* of research, I finally found a video so those of you that don’t play/watch soccer could see what I was talking about.  Go to 2:19 in the video.  Also, if you want to see more injury and foul videos, I posted some of the good ones on my twitter or identi.ca feeds while I was doing research for the article on 2010-05-19. Aside from the personal space thing, Europeans also seem to have this thing about hands on people’s faces.  Don’t touch my damn face.  It’s that simple.  The video quality on the YouTube video to which I linked is so bad it’s hard to see if there are hands to the face, but hands on face is pretty much what it sounds like.

As you might have guessed, he comes up to me to pat me on the back and I probably turned around at the precise wrong moment as he was trotting back up the field.  So, I punch him.  I startled him more than I hurt him.  Keeper gloves aren’t exactly designed for this sort of thing and I haven’t thrown a punch in a long, long time…like since elementary school I think.  I’ve thought about MMA before but my one punch is an indication I have a long way to go before that becomes anything more than the dumbest idea of my life. :)

Apparently, our villain goes up to one of our mutual friends (which I didn’t know was a mutual friend at the time) and said “I just got punched again!” or something of that nature, which now I can look back and think is funny.  Apparently our mutual friend has had to tackle him while drunk to avoid getting beat down.  He wasn’t drunk this time, but as dumb as what he did was….maybe he was.

*Playing goalkeeper in pickup is like signing up to be at the other end of a firing squad.  People don’t play defense and on our particular field there’s no lines with which to judge where the ball is.  Also, to play goalkeeper properly you have to go out hard to punch balls and take the ball of people’s feet.  It’s a high impact position and it’s just difficult to play properly in pickup if you don’t want to get too physical.  I’m not making an excuse, but on top of the other reasons, I don’t like playing in the goal because I can’t not take it seriously.  Playing in the goal gets my adrenaline going and I’m not short on adrenaline.  Me playing in the field during pickup is the safest place for everyone involved. :)  Also, had I been playing in the field, my face wouldn’t have been on the ground, ya know?

So, I think there are three morals to this story.

1) If you are a captain, a coach, an administrator or even just a team member trying to make a difference, address problems early.  You catch cancer early, it gets fixed.  There’s a reason “locker room cancer” is an oft-mentioned phrase.

2) If someone is clearly riled up, stay out of their face, no matter what the situation; bar, court, work, pitch.

3) Just calm the $(O*% down when you are playing pickup.  Keep it real, ya know?

Again, one last time, I’m no longer angry with this person, this is just a cautionary tale so that *you* don’t get punched in the face.

Also, I want to marry this woman.


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